Sunday, August 10, 2008

Going On An Airplane

Dear anyone working with the airlines and airport,
I am flying out tomorrow with a toddler. The past 2 times I have flown we have had some major issues with each other. Lets try to make this trip as smooth as possible. Here a few helpful tips:

1. Don't lose my carseat. I still haven't gotten the first carseat you lost(or money) and I'm done fighting. Please, lets not go through that again.
2. Gage's snacks are not drugs. You don't have to test everything with your little dipstick. It is very rude to stick germy devices in something my kid is going to consume.
3. I don't have 10 arms. I can't take our shoes off, fold up the stroller, throw my bag on the belt, and hold Gage at the same time. When I put him down he is going to run. He discovered how to walk/run only a few short months ago. Don't get annoyed at me because I'm holding the line up chasing him.
4. Same thing goes for getting all the stuff mentioned above back on and set up. I'm traveling alone with a toddler. Chill out.
5. If Gage 'poops' on the plane and there is a line for the coach bathroom don't have a cow if I ask to use the first class bathroom. I'm sure the 4 people sitting up there don't mind. For crying out loud, he pooped. Do you want to sit in your poop? No. Neither does he.

I can't think of anything more for you all but I know there is more. My flights are always hellish.

Thank you,
very frazzled mom

Dear passengers,
Don't roll your eyes at me if Gage is crying. He is a baby. That is what he does. I can't make him stop. He probably crying for a reason. His ears could hurt, he could be scared(you probably scared him!), or maybe he just feels like crying. Guess what? I paid the same thing you did to fly on the plane and I don't care if he is annoying you.

love,
the mom with a kid you hate

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Wish me luck.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good luck!

The only time I was annoyed with a mother on a plane (pre Ned of course!) was when she changed the poopy diaper on the seat right next to me. Not very pleasant! But having flown with Ned, I understand that the seat is probably bigger than the stupid changing table in the toilet.

Claremont First Ward said...

This is absolutely perfect. Perfect. One time I had to fly with my twins when they were infants. alone. Getting through security was hell.....couldn't hold both babies, and fold the stroller, and take off my shoes. And theirs. By the time I got through I was almost in tears. Almost. And then I got to the gate and my flight was cancelled. Then I did cry. :)

Hope the flight goes well......

Badass Geek said...

You are a stronger person than I, for attempting that again.

Whitney said...

AH! How very brave of you! People need to get over it. Kids will be kids and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. :) Let us know how it turns out!

CONNIE said...

Flying is not fun. If it is, I would be in the Philippines every year! I hope it's going to be a pleasant one for you.

Megan said...

Oh I can't imaging flying with a child, you are brave! It is a lot to take on, but you're an awesome Mom! Hope you have a good trip!!

Anonymous said...

I have flown multiple times alone with two little ones (the first time I was alone they were 11 months old and 2 1/2!) and I hate to tell you this, but TF Green has been HANDS DOWN my worst flying experiences with kids. Horrible. All the TSA people were just horribly unpleasant about the whole thing.

But I've also had great experiences at other airports and especially with the Southwest employees.

Gool luck!

Pleasant Living said...

Good luck!

Angie said...

Well said. Hope you have a great trip.

Bee said...

Good luck. My coworker has the same issues, and she always feels so guilty. You gotta do what you gotta do. Hope you have a great trip!

Anonymous said...

Good luck, man. Sounds like my kids, if I ever have any, won't be traveling.

Anonymous said...

HAHA love your perspective!

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MereinSC said...

haha, well i had a very interesting experience with airports yesterday... i officially hate airports. i'm going to put a post up about it later today so you can get my whole, long, drawn out story :)

hope your flight went as well as possible!

That Nora Girl said...

I flew alone with my son from Dallas to Manchester when we moved to Maine. I was so scared about it because the first time I flew with him my husband was with me, and that didn't even go very well. I feared the worst but it wasn't too bad. The worst was when he had a diaper explosion right before we went through security and I couldn't use the Bjorn for the rest of the (three!) flights. Man... so glad we're not flying again soon. I hope your trip home goes smoothly! Have fun with your mom!